Responsibilites, forgivness, people, relationships, etc. etc. etc.

I don't understand why people run away from responsibilities or why they walk away from a simple, effortless resolution.
Everyday I get a step closer to "letting it go" or "forgiving" everyday, and the person brings me a step closer to stress, and undesired, un needed issues.
I don't think I have ever run away from responsibility, or something that I say I am committed to, or own, and un necessarily, I get blamed.
Today, Ms. Lina was talking to her sister. They always talk, about the most random and un necessary topics. I am listening to Ms. Stubborn ramble about her mother not giving her gold when she got married, and all the other children (5 bro/sis) got gold for their marriage, so I immediately, these words uttered out of my mouth, "I will give you as much as gold you want, don't tension yourself and sit here and talk about what happened 22 years ago, let it go..." (I have heard these conversations before and I let it be, because I understand the need to vent, or talk through something, but over and over again!!!) and immediately, the she hands me the phone because the sister wants to talk to me. I never talk to her, and out of no where today, she was out to teach me a lesson. I grab the phone and she says "honey, what do you know, you don't understand anything. I see her going through hell, she doesn't want gold, she wants mental support, and its not about gold, its about the politics between parents and children and how the older brother rules the house and didn't allow anything to the three younge sisters. Is that fair, honey?" I reply, "I didn't say it was fair, I am just saying that it is past, and not past few days or months ago, its past 30 YEARS ago!" She says, "You won't understand, no matter how much gold you give to her, she doesn't want that, its not her age, and she won't be satisfied with gold, because it is not part of her need or desire anymore." I respond, "Yes, I understand, I told her that I am willing to give her whatever she wants" and then silence. Again, she says, "Look what Jack did, he left the house, doesn't talk to your mom, doesn't do anything for her, doesn't give her any attention, and YOU, YOU also left for Seattle, you could have done psychology in Boise or you could have changed your subject so you could study here." I respond, "What Jack is doing is wrong, but when I went to Seattle, I told her that I will take her with me, let me settle down, then she can come live with me and they don't have psychology PhD here, I finished my Bachelor's here and then I went." She says, "Well now your doing Computer Graphics, and again you are going to leave, now what" and I respond, "And I have told her that I will take her to San Francisco with me, take care of her and won't have to worry." and she loudly says, "You know you are just selfish, and you are going to leave, not take care of her, and you don't realize what you put her through, and forget you trying to buy a property for her, that's not going to happen, or I doubt you will ever do anythign for her" and that point tears flooded down my eyes, I gave Ms. Lina the phone, took my laptop, came in my room, closed the door and cried about this, and stomach pain.

Ms. Lina's Sister,
First of all, you have no right to say anything to me. None! Zero! Maybe you should dwell on your husband's actions instead of mine and defining values and relationships for me and Ms. Lina. I have zero respect for you. I use to respect you, listent to you, talk to you, but not from last 3-4 years. I don't like you, and I have let things be for your sisterhood to stay alive. You talk about me leaving my mom, to study, to make her and my future better, and what about when she left me, and look where my family is standing right now. 4 different opposite poles. There have been times when my mom has run away from her responsibility towards me- TWICE! Once because of you! but I have never ran away from her. Never! Regardless anything- my health, education, realtionships, ANYTHING! You don't know what I have done for her. I have tried to make her feel special with greeting cards, flowers, presents, taking her to movie, taking her shopping, doing waht she asks me to do, trying my best to give her the mental support. I have put my tears, my feelings, my happiness aside for her and done it with all my heart. If I don't tell you these things you wouldn't know and consider me selfish, and if I tell you then you think I am being selfish by listing off this. But you know what you focus on, the times that I didn't do something because I was busy with school, or work or maintaining my other, thus less important, but other relationships, or myself. You focus on the time when I walked away cause I couldn't handle the pain, the trauma, or the fights. At 15 I wasn't strong enough to do what it takes to put your husband behind bars, that too when I was too dependent on other family, dad, mom, etc. But now, being used to no one being on my side, I am strong and independent enough to do what it takes to teach you a lesson. The reason I am not doing it or won't ever do it is because of yours and my mom's relationships and because I know how to put the PAST BEHIND and not live it and make myself miserable. I would rather focus on now and future, and try not to change anything. One of these days, sit in fron of me and have real converstation. Get something straight, I will never run away from my responsibilities and duties towards my mom, even if she took a knife a ran it through my stomach. I will never forget my duties towards her, my brother and my father. It doesn't matter to me whether they are living in a different continent, I will always be there for those three no matter what. I don't forget my responsibilites and what is right. Whatever they have done thus far is more than enough for me to feel that I will always be the only daughter and sister that needs to play that role.
I have tried over and over again to forgive, but I can't! I will not forgive and I give up even trying to forgive ruthless people, but I will not run away from responsibilites.
Honey